Slow Loris

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Welcome to the next installment of Shit That Can Kill You Fridays!
This week STCKYF features the Slow Loris.

Ah the Slow Loris. If there was one word to describe the Slow Loris I think it would have to be cuddly. When you see its big eyes you can't help but say "awwww!". Plus it looks super soft. The Slow Loris' level of unadulterated cuteness makes it seem like the perfect family pet. Just imagine this little guy just doing Slow Loris things around the house. Climbing on furniture. Eating your house plants (which normally would upset you but the darn thing is just so cute you let it slide). Looking at you with those big round eyes. THEN TRYING TO MURDER YOU WITH ITS POISONOUS ELBOWS!!

Bet you didn't see that coming, did you? The Slow Loris has the rare mammalian trait, unique to lorisid primates, of being able to produce a toxin. For reasons only known to science, the glands that produce the toxin are on the Slow Loris' arm. The Loris licks the glands to mix the toxin in with their saliva creating a toxic bite. This seems a little silly to me. Just have the toxin glands in your mouth so you can be ready to bite stuff all the time... but they didn't ask me. Interestingly enough, for the toxin to be potent it must be mixed with the saliva. If it is not mixed it acts as more of a mild irritant.

So what is in this toxic bite the Slow Loris has been bragging about? This is usually when I tell you all about neurotoxins or heart failure, but today I am not going to do that. Not because I don't want to, believe me, I do. It's just that the toxin in the Slow Loris' bite does not have any of the effects we usually see. In fact, the toxin in similar to the allergen in cat dander so the chances of it causing an allergic reaction are far higher than the chances of toxicosis. I know, kind of a bummer, right? But do not fret (or do fret, depending on how you'd like to look at this) because the Slow Loris' bit can and has killed people. Science claims that the deaths are the result of anaphylactic shock, but isn't entirely sure. Some studies have shown that the toxin contains batrachotoxins (if you check your notes you will see that this is also used by the Golden Poison Dart Frog) but only in recently caught wild Lorises. This toxin is not naturally part of the Slow Loris' venom, but it is acquired when the Loris eats certain species of beetle.

Luckily you are unlikely to run into these adorable monsters in the wild, unless you travel to Southeast Asia. The indigenous cultures in this region believe that the Slow Loris has the supernatural power to cure wounds and ward off evil spirits (big if true). For instance the Slow Loris is thought to be able to heal itself instantly after falling from a tree. Neat trick, right? But the best Loris lore comes from Borneo. They believe that the Lorises are the the gatekeepers for the heavens and that each person has a personal loris waiting for them in the afterlife. So when you die you get a cute, fuzzy wide eyed loris? Sign me up!

Stay safe out there.

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Charles R Mercer

Amateur Loris Enthusiast